Nurses nurse,and teachers teach,
and tailors mend,
and preachers preach,
and barbers trim,
and chauffeurs haul,
and parents get to do it all. -Babs Bell Hajdusiewicz
Nurses nurse,Familiarity breeds children. -Mark Twain
Parenthood is a lot easier to get into than get out of. -Bruce Lansky
If your parents never had children, chances are you wont, wither. -Dick Cavett
A crying baby is the best form of birth control. -Carole Tabbron
Have children while your parents are still young
enough to take care of them. -Rita Rudner
An advantage to having one child is you always
know who did it. -Babs Bell Hajdusiewicz
I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got
to sleep alone until I was married. -Lewis Grizzard
It goes without saying that you should never have more
children then you have car windows. -Erma Bombeck
GOD could not be everywhere. That's why he made mothers. -Jewish Proverb
If evolution really works, how come
mothers only have two hands? -Milton Berle
It's not easy being a mother. If it were easy,
fathers would do it. -Dorothy on The Golden Girls
Hey, the way I figure it is this: if the kids are still alive by the time
my husband comes home, I've done my job. -Roseanne Arnold
Any mother could perform the jobs of several
air traffic controllers with ease -Lisa Alther
The phrase 'Working Mother' is redundant. -Jane Sellman
Before I was married I had six theories about raising children. now I
have
six children and no theories. -John Wilmot, earl of Rochester
Most parents find it very hard to be consistent -
except
when it come to losing their temper. -Bruce Lansky
I didn't make the same mistakes my parents made when
they raised me.
I was too busy making new ones. -Bruce Lansky
The quickest for a parent to get a child's
attention
is to sit down and look comfortable. -Lane Olinghouse
Setting a good example for Children takes all the fun
out of middle age. -William Feather
Parents: A pecuilar group who first try to get their
children to
walk and talk, and then try to get them to sit down and shut up.
-Wagsters Dictionary of Humor and Wit
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot - but I always
found them. -Rodney Dangerfield
Dear GOD, I pray for patience. And I want it right
now. -Oren Arnold
We learn many things from children. Patience, for instance.
-Frankling P. Jones
A child enters your home and for the next twenty years
makes
so much noise you can hardly stand it. The child departs, leaving
the
house so silent you think you are going mad. -John Andrew Holmes
Insanity is hereditary - you get it from your kids.
-Sam Levinson
You know you've lost control when you're the one
who
goes to your room. -Baba Bell Hajdusiewicz
Before I had kids I went home after work to
rest. Now
I go to work to rest. -Simon Ruddell
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing
is like
shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. -Phyllis Diller
Children are a grat comfort in your old age -
and they help you reach it faster, too. -Lionel Kauffman
You know you've spent too much time carpooling your
kids when fast-food,
drive-through servers recognize your voice. -Linda Fiterman
I was doing the family grocery shopping accompanied
by two children,
an event I hope to see included in the Olympics in the near future. -Anna
Quindlen
